Demotion to Destiny and the Power of Believing in Myself

It’s hard to know where to begin, especially when reflecting on something difficult. 

I was 22, full of hope, when I accepted a $16,000 offer from a boutique search firm. My parents worried it was a pyramid scheme because It wasn’t even listed with the Better Business Bureau. I was undeterred. I said yes, not knowing that decision would shape the next 29 years of my life. I spent nearly three decades at Lucas Group and would still be there today if we hadn’t been acquired by the world’s largest search firm.

Throughout that journey, I’ve grown beyond anything I could have imagined. I’ve built a life I’m deeply proud of, with my rock-star husband of 26 years (who was our stay-at-home parent) and our two amazing kids. But what’s most interesting is that many of the things I value most almost didn’t happen.

When I started out, I thought I’d work for a few years, get married, have kids, and spend my days at Neiman Marcus and on the tennis court. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. It’s just not who I am. Even though I believed my career would be short-lived, I gave it everything I had…within the eight hours a day I was willing to work back then.

After eight years in Dallas, I divorced my first husband, who wanted me to be prettier and quieter (a story for another time) and married my dream partner, despite everyone’s doubts. We wanted to move back home to Denver, and to my surprise, the firm asked me to open a new office there. My incredible mentor and boss, who later became our CEO, made it clear: if I performed well and didn’t have kids yet (yes, that’s illegal), the possibilities were endless.

I did extraordinarily well, until I didn’t.

In our first year, we launched the fastest and most successful startup in company history. I became pregnant, much to the chagrin of leadership, but I was determined to prove I could have it all. My first day back after six weeks of maternity leave (the maximum allowed) was September 11, 2001. The world changed that day. I walked into the office with tears in my eyes and breast milk on my shirt, determined not to let anyone down. I would be a great mom, a great leader, and rise above the tragedy.

That worked, until it didn’t.

I pushed hard. I yelled. I tried to lead from the front. But everything I did in the following two years was wrong. We were failing. I was failing. I look back now and cringe at some of my choices, but I truly believed I could fix it. Leadership disagreed, and I was demoted.

At the time, I had a three-year-old, an eight-month-old, and a stay-at-home husband depending on my salary. It was the lowest point of my professional life. I had bought into the story that I was destined to be a great leader at the firm, and suddenly, I wasn’t sure how I’d even support my family.

I felt like I was at the wrong end of a tunnel, desperate to reach the light. Getting there took work, deep, personal work. I started seeing a counselor, and when he asked what time, I’d come back next week after our first session, I knew I had some serious healing to do.

I made a decision: I would fight back. I took a role as a producer with 100% commission. It wasn’t the warm welcome I’d hoped for, but it was a chance to prove myself. Whether the doubt around me was real or imagined, I was determined to show what I was made of. My family was counting on me.

That first year, I ranked in the top 10% of producers nationwide. In my final year at Lucas Group, I was #2 out of 500 producers.

It’s been 20 years since that demotion, and it was the best thing that ever happened to me professionally.

Today, I love being a leader without managing a team. I’ve mentored countless producers who’ve gone on to do incredible things. I’ve won awards, built a beautiful life for my family, and most importantly, I never gave up. I didn’t let that moment define me. I fought back, and I continue to fight every year. Some years are harder than others, but I know at my core: the only person who can hold me back is me.

I love what I do. I know I’m meant to make a positive impact, and I push every day to make sure I do just that.

I’m grateful that someone once didn’t believe in me, because it taught me the most important lesson of all:

All I have to do is believe in myself.

-Lisa D.